The Men We All Want but Should Never Have

 

One day, I was surfing on one of my favorite blogs www.verysmartbrothas.com, and I stumbled upon an interesting post “Don’t Date Her Dude: Chicks Men Think They Want Until They Actually Get One,” and I was immediately intrigued. They listed the typical douche bags, but they left out a few key desirably undesirable men. There are a few guys that I’d love to spend the rest of my life with that I should in fact be running from—very fast. Below are the ones I'd add to the list:

The Sensitive Guy

Breakup after heartbreak after breakup, we women tend to seek the guy that promises he’ll take precious care of our heart. It’s in tender condition, and this is the one guy that seems to relate to our pain because he is in touch with his “feelings.” When you hurt, he hurts. When you cry, he cries. You emotionally feel as one with him…until he grows a vagina and starts menstruating. The sensitive man is really just the temperamental women with an Adam’s apple. Unless you want to take care of an emotional crybaby, stay clear away.

The Sean “Diddy Puff Daddy P. Diddy Puffy” Combs
This man seems like he has it all: confidence, a great career, and a walk-in closet. He will treat you like a queen. He’ll splurge on you. The problem? He's really just an egotistical duntz on a power trip who’ll—and this is a big no-no—never get married.

The Sex Machine
This man promises to be your sexual fantasies in the flesh. He has tricks that you’ve never read about and promises the big O every time. You may wake up with a broken back in a euphoric state, however this guy’s just going to turn out to be a pervert with no qualities beyond the surface that would make any woman find him stimulating—besides what his mouth can do.

The Mama's Boy
Women yearn for this kind of man. Why? He has the utmost respect for his mother, which in turn usually results in him having love and respect for us. He talks about how she’s his everything. He calls and makes sure she’s doing okay. He occasionally takes her out to lunch. Sounds like the perfect gentlemen. Truth is, you will be entering a polygamous relationship—one between you, him...and his mama.

The Trophy

Physically immaculate, The Trophy is the guy you bring home to your mother—and she passes out on the kitchen floor. Old women fan themselves when he walks by, young women wish he was on their arm, and men envy his magnetic pull on women. Everything on the outside is perfection when it comes to him. Unfortunately, he’s dumb as a rock and as boring as one too.

The Average Joe

You’ve messed with the moguls, the athletes, and the pretty boys, so what do you think is the answer? The Average Joe. He seems like a safe bet because he’s just that: safe. Average job. Average looks. Average goals. Average personality. You think you know what you’re getting with this guy. However, for every average guy there’s five average girls trying to steal him. Yes, ladies the Average Joe is a cheater too. A less attractive, quite boring cheater. Go figure.